If you missed last Wednesday’s newsletter, catch up on part 1 here.
After the incident with Mark*, I channeled my anger and immediately called my CEO, Jeff*, who was back in the US.
I explained the situation and luckily, he gave me the warmest response as I held back tears, still trying to exhibit a professional demeanor after the most humiliating experience of my career and life.
He empathetically comforted me, and tried to bear the responsibility of it: “I’m so sorry, Thania. I’m so mad.”
We then made plans to report it to the international headquarters and founder of the parent company.
My request was that Mark take a sexual harassment course, publicly admit his behavior was inappropriate, and present his learnings to the company so others could avoid making the same mistakes.
None of that was honored — in fact, after my US CEO and I reported it to the international HQ and founder, there was no follow-up on my incident and zero consequences for Mark.
Seven years later (yes, seven), I was contacted by the company’s Global HR Director who was conducting an investigation into Mark and several sexual harassment accusations.
Turns out he had continued his behavior, and got caught so badly they could no longer deny the liability and damage he caused.
She asked me to recall details that were nearly a decade old.
While all the intricate details that once agonized my mind were memorialized as feelings instead of well-recalled incidents, I did my best to tell my story.
Thankfully, my photographic memory and the fact that I’d told close friends about it made it easier to 1) retell and 2) recall.
The times and dates were blurry — in trauma, it’s said that you often “blackout” or “brown out”. Your brain does it on purpose to protect you.
But when it comes to legal matters, it’s easy to have your words twisted.
What if I present the wrong timetable? What if I get accused of being a liar because I messed up one detail?
I didn’t care. “F*ck that guy,” I thought.
I meticulously crafted my sentences and was honest when a particular detail was blurry or not easily recalled.
I told her the important things: how he made me feel, the text he sent, the weird physical stalking I experienced after the incident, the inappropriate behavior he conducted when went to the global CEO’s house for Easter, and so much more I haven’t shared in this article.
The HR lady was professional, yet caring. She was empathetic.
My intuition told me I wasn’t the first interview that she’d conducted regarding this predator.
I felt sorry for her in a way.
Having to clean up the mess of leaders before her who hadn’t done their jobs and acted immorally; now she was here to pick up the pieces.
I also felt mad. I couldn’t believe it had taken THIS long for justice.
Imagine all the other victims who might have been saved from this had THEY done something sooner.
Had they put people over profit. Equity and equality over discomfort or bad PR.
Ultimately, Mark* was found guilty of sexual harassment in the workplace and “resigned” from his role as UK CEO.
I have zero regrets about how I handled myself, but I do regret not taking legal action and demanding more from my US CEO.
I wanted to secure that global marketing role and I didn’t want to “cause trouble”, so I played “nice”.
If you’ve ever been a fighter of sexual harassment or sexual assault, I want to honor your experience and say that I see you, and I’m proud of you — you’re amazing.
If you ever find yourself in a position of sexual harassment at work, I want to empower you to speak up, take space, and demand accountability.
You never know what positive impact your speaking up and taking action can have.
Lots of love & empowerment,
Thania Guardino (Content Mgr. at TA)
*Names have been changed to prevent inciting a witch hunt.