Weekender #174

The Assist Newsletter
February 13, 2025
A gray background with colorful wavy lines and white text that reads, โ€œIn the middle of every difficulty lies opportunity.โ€ โ€“ Albert Einstein.

๐Ÿค” Brainteaser of the day: What can be stolen, mistaken or altered, yet never leaves you your entire life?

Click here to see the answer.

โœ… Today’s Checklist:ย 

    • Joanna shares tips for maintaining friendships
    • Your next โ€œwork focus playlistโ€ has arrived
    • Pet of the week: Bongo

QUICK LINKS

๐Ÿ• Stop stress eating in its tracks with these expert tips.

๐Ÿ–ค Discover 25 meaningful activities to celebrate Black History Month.

๐Ÿ“‹ Learn how to create an ADHD-friendly to-do list that maximizes focus and productivity.

๐Ÿ”ฅ Dive into why burnout is a cultural issue, not a personal one, in this eye-opening insight article.

ADULTING

A digital drawing of a person standing awkwardly in a social setting while others engage in conversation, highlighting feelings of isolation or introversion.

Maintaining Friendships as a Busy AF Adult

 

Ever since high school, I was the planner in my friend groupโ€”the one making the reservations, organizing the birthday dinners, and sending the โ€œSoโ€ฆwhen are we free?โ€ texts. And, honestly? I still am. With the same group of friends. Two decades later.

I like to think that my efforts are a big reason why weโ€™ve all stayed close. But now that Iโ€™m in my late 30s (waitโ€”does 35 going on 36 count as late? Please still be mid ๐Ÿซ ), Iโ€™ve definitely noticed the enthusiasm for planning has faded. Life is justโ€ฆa lot. People have kids, demanding jobs, and a lot less energy than our โ€œ9 p.m. is earlyโ€ days. Our priorities have shifted. Weโ€™ve traded long party nights for daytime buzzes at brunch.

Iโ€™ve also noticed that my needs in friendships have changed. Iโ€™ve swapped FOMO for JOMO and no longer feel the pressure to keep everyone happy. Instead, I focus on friendships that feel mutualโ€”ones that donโ€™t drain me or feel one-sided. (A mindset shift that took way too long to embrace, btw.)

So, how do you actually maintain friendships as an adultโ€”without it feeling like another to-do list item?

1๏ธโƒฃ Make It Easy to Stay in Touch

Not every friendship requires hours-long catch-ups. A quick meme or even a โ€œthinking of youโ€ text keeps the connection alive. Lately, Iโ€™ve been loving voice notesโ€”you get the full context of someoneโ€™s mood and can listen on your own time.

2๏ธโƒฃ Be the Initiator (But Donโ€™t Keep Score)

Some people just arenโ€™t planners, and thatโ€™s okay. If you value the friendship, reach out first. But if youโ€™re always the one making the effort with little in return, it might be time to re-evaluate. Iโ€™ve run into this a lotโ€”sometimes, a simple convo can help. Your friends should know your needs too, not just your family or significant other.

3๏ธโƒฃ Schedule โ€œLazyโ€ Friend Dates

Not every hangout needs to be a big event. Running errands together, FaceTiming a show, or even virtual co-working still counts as quality time. My go-to? Weekly horror movie nights with my two best friends and husbandโ€”snacks, terrible horror films, zero pressure.
When I visited a friend in Cleveland who just had a baby, she was exhausted and barely had time to herself. Instead of a sit-down catch-up, I joined her Costco run. We shopped, we chatted, and honestly? We had a great time.

4๏ธโƒฃ Create Low-Lift Traditions

Standing plansโ€”like a monthly dinner, quarterly trip, or Sunday coffee walksโ€”take the guesswork out of scheduling and keep friendships running on autopilot. Last year, my friends and I made a โ€œgroupโ€ New Yearโ€™s resolution: each month, someone would host dinner or plan an activity. We didnโ€™t hit every month, but we got close. It set the expectation that we wouldnโ€™t go months without seeing each otherโ€”and made it a fun challenge to keep up.

Outside of my close friend circle, I also have three monthly virtual catch-ups with people Iโ€™ve networked with over the past year. I treat them like any other meetingโ€”adding a recurring slot to my calendar and only canceling if I really have to (not just because I donโ€™t feel like it). Youโ€™d be surprised how much this small habit keeps connections alive.

5๏ธโƒฃ Accept That Some Friendships Will Fadeโ€”And Thatโ€™s Okay

One of my toughest friendship breakups was with my best friend from high schoolโ€”the one who basically lived at my house, was close with my family, and my go-to for sweatpants-and-reality-TV nights. Then, in 2018, she left the country without warning and cut off all contact. No explanation, no goodbye. I wrestled with it for a long time, even bringing it up to my therapist.

Her advice? You canโ€™t control other peopleโ€™s choicesโ€”only how you respond. The best thing I could do was let go and focus on the friendships that were still showing up. Not all friendships are meant to last forever, and thatโ€™s okay. Some will naturally fade, others you may need to actively let go of. The key is knowing when to hold onโ€”and when to move on.

At the end of the day, maintaining friendships isnโ€™t about effort, itโ€™s about alignment. Prioritize the people who make your life betterโ€”not busier.

circle image of Joanna, Co-Founder of TA

Joanna (TA Co-Founder)

ORGANIZATION TOOLS

A digital illustration of a hand holding various productivity icons, including a target with an arrow, a stopwatch, a checklist, and happy/successful indicators.

Scattered Tasks, Missed Deadlines? Get Organized Today

 

Your to-do list is a black hole. Your inbox is a battlefield. And somehow, even after a full day of work, you still feel like you got nothing done.

The problem? Disorganization is silently sabotaging your productivity.

How to Get Your Life (and Work) Together

  • ๐Ÿ”— One Hub for Everything โ€“ If your tasks live in 10 different places, you need Wrikeโ€”a centralized system for projects, progress tracking, and collaboration.
  • ๐Ÿ“Š Organize Projects Like a Boss โ€“ Messy spreadsheets arenโ€™t project management. Smartsheet gives you spreadsheet-style organization with automation and collaboration tools, so your team actually moves forward.
  • ๐Ÿ“ Write It Down, or Itโ€™s Gone โ€“ If you rely on memory, youโ€™re setting yourself up for failure. Use Notion to keep everythingโ€”notes, tasks, projectsโ€”in one flexible, searchable space.
  • ๐Ÿ—“ Overbooked and Overwhelmed? Resource Guru helps you balance workloads and schedule smarterโ€”so no one burns out.
  • ๐Ÿ’ฐ Payments Always Delayed? Bill.comย automates invoices, approvals, and cash flowโ€”so you never chase payments again.

Disorganization keeps you busy, not productive. These tools make clarity, efficiency, and execution effortlessโ€”so you get more done, with less stress.

STAFF PICKS

A graphic featuring three polaroid-style frames: โ€œReadโ€ with a Nicholas Sparks novel, โ€œWatchโ€ with 90 Day Fiancรฉ, and โ€œListenโ€ with a green-lit keyboard labeled โ€œCoding Mode.โ€

๐Ÿ“š Read: See Me by Nicholas Sparks

Romance, suspense, and past secrets collidingโ€”See Me is classic Nicholas Sparks with an edge. Two people with complicated histories fall for each other, but their love story takes a dark turn when the past wonโ€™t stay buried.

๐Ÿ“บ Watch: TLCโ€™s 90 Day Fiancรฉ: Last Resort

Couples from 90 Day Fiancรฉ attempt therapy to salvage their relationshipsโ€”some succeed, some spiral, all of it is wildly entertaining. Expect a mix of heartfelt breakthroughs, messy drama, and expert-level gaslighting. Equal parts relationship deep-dive and reality TV chaos.

๐ŸŽง Listen: Coding Playlist

Recommended by a member of our The A-List Alliance Slack community, this playlist is ideal for deep focus sessionsโ€”like for coding, or other heavy brain tasks. With a seamless mix of beats that keep you in the zone, it’s a go-to for productivity without distractions.

HR TOOL

Illustration of a $100 bill with two colorful gift cards, one labeled '$100 gift voucher,' atop a gift box with a ribbon.

Get Paid $100 to Check Out This HR Game-Changer

 

You hired a new employee. Exciting, right? Except now youโ€™re stuck in an HR vortexโ€”endless paperwork, setting up payroll, juggling benefits, and making sure IT grants them access to the right tools.

By the time theyโ€™re up and running, youโ€™ve lost hours (or worse, days). And just when you think youโ€™re in the clear, someone asks about tax filings, compliance, or PTO tracking.

This isnโ€™t leadership. This is admin overload. And Rippling is here to fix that:

  • ๐Ÿ“‹ Simplify Onboarding โ€“ A new hireโ€™s first days shouldnโ€™t feel like a bureaucratic maze. Make it fast, smooth, and automated.
  • ๐Ÿ’ธ Stop Payroll Panic โ€“ Taxes, benefits, direct depositsโ€”handling payroll manually is a disaster waiting to happen. Automate it.
  • ๐Ÿ” IT Shouldnโ€™t Be a Bottleneck โ€“ Setting up (or revoking) employee access to software and devices shouldnโ€™t take days. Sync HR with IT.
  • โš–๏ธ Stay Compliant Without the Stress โ€“ Wage laws, tax filings, and benefits regulations change constantly. You need a system that keeps up.

Rippling automates everythingโ€”HR, payroll, and ITโ€”so you can stop managing admin work and start leading. New hires get onboarded in minutes, not days. Payroll runs itself, compliance updates automatically, and employee access is granted (or revoked) with a click.

Because great leaders donโ€™t waste time on paperwork. They build teams, drive growth, and let Rippling handle the rest.

JUST FOR FUN

A meme with a cartoon character peacefully sleeping in bed under the caption, โ€œHow do you deal with stress & anxiety?โ€ with the reply, โ€œMe.โ€

PETย OF THE WEEK

A small, fluffy black and white dog sits on a cozy surface with a green plush toy nearby. The graphic is framed with paw prints and bone icons, with the text "Pet of the Week" and a Spot Pet Insurance logo.

Meet Bongo

 

Bongo is a 2-year-old rescued Shih Tzu mix who loves his food-themed toys (sashimi and pea pod are two faves), guarding his backyard against all squirrel and bird invaders, greeting the mail carrier and making new friends. He’s working on his social skills and supports his human by being a great officemate.

Pssstโ€ฆDid you know 1 in 3 pets need emergency vet care every year ๐Ÿถ๐Ÿฑ? Spot Pet Insurance helps pet parents get up to 90% cash back on covered vet billsโ€”so you can focus on cuddles, not costly vet visits.

Plus, unlock up to $1,000 in savings on pet faves like The Farmerโ€™s Dog, Furbo, and BarkBox!

Learn more & snag up to 20% off your Spot policy.

๐Ÿพ Got a cute fur baby? Submit them to be our pet of the week in an upcoming issue.

SPILL THE TEA

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TA Poll Weekender #174

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